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I was born in the jungle of Costa Rica, near the Panamanian border in the early 20th century. The tourist boom had not yet come to Costa Rica, and the country was almost entirely primary rainforest. As a mischievous young primate, I often ventured out through the forest to explore my environment. One day I accidentally made my way to a banana plantation. I hid in a bunch of bananas watching what I thought were giant monkeys (I had never seen humans before!) harvesting the bananas. Suddenly my bunch was cut and thrown on the cart... I was trapped! Before I could escape, the bananas were loaded onto a ship and taken to Europe. When we docked, I found myself in a foreign land... a world as unlike my jungle home as one could imagine. I was in London. I survived on the streets of London for a while, but I soon realized that without an education I would end up just another street monkey for the rest of my life. I travelled to Paris and there I completed my education in philosophy, ethics, science, mathematics, and history (as humans tell it...) Most professors at my school refused to admit me to their classrooms because I looked so different from the other primate students (and I wasn't wearing any clothes, just my fur...). I refused to give up though, and spent most of my time in the library. I persevered through the blatant discrimination I faced, and the university was finally forced to recognize my achievement and grant me a degree. I returned to London eager to put my newly minted wisdom to work, but was detained by the authorities due to my lack of documentation. I was unable to produce a passport, visa, or any form of identification (they didn't believe me when I tried to explain my situation...) The authorities remanded me to the monkey prison at the London Zoo. There I spent many a night in frustration... I was reduced to a tourist attraction, just one of the common monkeys who are expected to leap around and throw stuff at the unsuspecting visitors. I had been through worse though. I knew I could remedy my situation if I simply put my mind to it. In July of 2006, after many months of careful planning, I escaped from the zoo with several of my cellmates. It was the greatest jailbreak in London that year! We made headlines and many Londoners rallied to our cause, treated us as heroes. I carefully made my way to Heathrow Airport and stowed away inside a plane bound for Miami. Once there, I evaded US customs officials and ended up at my current home, Monkey Jungle, where I finally feel that I belong. I can now spend my days as I please, putting my hard-won education to good use through my work on Cramster. If you would like to visit me in person, please come to Monkey Jungle. The information is on my website link. Keep up your hard work, and good luck with your classes!
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